What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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