This girl is more easily done than said...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
