oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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