sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize