Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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