You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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