I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
