Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
