Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
