In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Holy sore nipples Batman
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
