I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize