a queef is a wish your heart makes.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize