Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I believe in your delicious
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
