Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
