'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I don't think brook has ever known best
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
