Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize