Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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