you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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