ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
