peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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