i barfeds in our rink
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
