she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
