whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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