I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Randomize
