the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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