how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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