does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
