Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
