Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
