i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
