Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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