This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
