Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize