I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
