you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I have grass duct taped all over my body
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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