I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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