I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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