i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
