i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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