I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize