coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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