The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
third nipple confirmed
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
