Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
