i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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