I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
