so that wasnt chicken after all
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
God gave him joint rollers for hands
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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