He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
