'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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