if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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