No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
