she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize