just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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